I Wonder (feat. Erin Kim)

uh,gowe ,Gifted Of West East,
Uh，Gowe,東西方之結晶
this song is a dedicated
讓我把這首歌獻給
to a very special woman
一個十分特別的女人
who had me at the tender age of eighteen
那個在十八歲就生下我的女人
I never had a chance to see you
我從沒機會見到你
this is a dedicated to you
但這首歌是送給你的
My Ma
媽媽
This is her story(Check it out)
這是她的故事（開始吧）
Verse 1
唱段1
Her mind was confused with a plus at the tip of the tube
她被身上的那些插著的管子所困惑著
Sick as she threw up with a cup take a sip of abuse
孕吐中卻還要忍受那些痛苦
So she gets nervous cause her man left her
她變得不安起來，因為她的男人離開了她
After the *** and he jets she thought that he loved her
OOXX之後他就遠走高飛了但是她卻以為他依然愛著他
You see shes 18, and shes a bit conscious
這時候的她才十八歲，
About her dress and the reflection of her own image
對自己的穿衣打扮和形像都還有些自己的想法
Timid in speech, shes limited given a week
這種事卻難以啟口，她害怕的躲在家裡一個星期都不敢出門
With her tummy blowing up so that people can see
她的肚子越來越大，大到人們都已經顯而易見了
But she decides to keep it, said no to abortion
但是她決定生下這個孩子，她說不會去墮胎
The feet kicks in her stomach comes without a warning
嬰兒的腳沒有預警地一次又一次地踢她的肚子
She feels the pain though, cause her parents cry
她感受到了疼痛，是因為他的家人在哭泣
And the shame eats her alive when she closed her eyes
她閉上眼睛，感覺羞辱在吞噬著她
Then the day comes, she gives birth to a son
日子終將來臨，她生了一個兒子
Kim Sung-Hoon, soon she holds and kisses her love
金星宏，她抱著，親吻著她的摯愛
Wishing it never ended, taking a mental picture
就讓時間定格在這個畫面吧
Hoping through her tears that her son would have a better future
她的眼淚中，充滿著她的兒子會有一個更好地未來的希望
Chorus
副歌
I wonder if theres a smile on your face
我不知道你的臉上是否常掛微笑
Sometimes I miss you and long for your embrace
有時候，我很想念你，也渴望得到你的擁抱
I never could thank you, enough for holding on
我從來沒有機會感謝你，我也沒有放棄這種想法
Dear mama mama mama, forever, I'll hold you in my heart
親愛的媽媽啊，在我心裡你永遠沒有離開過我
Verse 2
唱段2
So she wonders, what happened to her son next
然後她在想啊，她的兒子將來會怎樣
Is there clothes on his back, food on his plate whats the context
他披在身上的衣服是怎樣的，盤子裡的吃的是什麼東西，過得還好嗎
The recollection of the day replays in her mindset
又不斷回想起以前的日子
And the ways she would try but just never could forget
她想忘記那些但是卻怎麼也忘不掉
Well he's okay, and he resides in the states
現在他過得還好，居住在美國
A needle in space in which rain makes it a beautiful place
雨點像針一樣刺著這個美麗的地方
Embraced by the culture and he's loved by all the members
他適應了這個地方的文化還有那些我愛的好朋友們
Until he turns 18 and his world get flipped
直到他十八歲那年的一天，他的世界觀顛倒了
He hears that his mom is not actually his and that complications
因為他聽說正在撫養他的媽媽並不是他的親生母親，那個撫養他的媽媽
Prevented her from having any kids and his real mom
並沒有任何自己親生的孩子（應該是不能生育），而他的真正的母親
Is actually Korean and she had, to give him up for adoption
是在韓國生下他的，然後她把他遺棄了
Cause she was young and was a student
因為那時她還非常的年輕而且還是個學生
Lost and was confused and, wrestling in the moment
在流言蜚語中迷失，困惑，掙扎
Am I Chinese or Korean? Am I destined in this union?
我是中國人還是韓國人？而我的命運卻在美國嗎？
And if I am what’s the purpose? I jot it in my verses
我是故意為之的產物嗎？我把這些都記在我的歌詞裡
So I replay it in my mind as I think about you
我不斷在腦子裡重複想著這些事情，想著你……
Chorus
副歌
I wonder iftheres a smile on your face
我不知道你的臉上是否常掛微笑
Sometimes I miss you and long for your embrace
有時候，我很想念你，也渴望得到你的擁抱
I never could thank you, enough for holding on
我從來沒有機會感謝你，我也沒有放棄這種想法
Dear mama mama mama, forever, I'll hold you in my heart
親愛的媽媽啊，在我心裡你永遠沒有離開過我
Verse 3
唱段3
If I could write a letter, and know that you would read it
如果你能讀到這封信，我知道你會讀到它的
I would tell you that I never once in my heart felt hatred
我只想告訴你我在心裡從來沒有怪你
Reinstated I would play a song and dance with you
我只想跟你唱一首歌，跟你跳一支舞，如果可以的話
Hold your hand as I thank the Lord for creating you
牽著你的手，然後感謝上蒼讓你出現了
As strong as you are cause in my mind I can't fathom
就像你當初我無法想像的那樣堅強
The pain and the guilt when all you heard was their gossip
你當時所感受到的那些痛苦和內疚都是那些人的流言蜚語
And still you stuck through it, when they called you foolish
但是在他們覺得你是個可笑的傻瓜的時候你卻仍然堅持撐了下來
And with this gift that I possess your probably loved music
我熱愛音樂的這個天賦也許就是你給我的吧
I hope you're doing well, I hope some day you'll see this
我希望你現在過得很好，我希望將來有一天你可以看見這封信
I hope I mean I really hope that you know Jesus on a deeper level
我希望，說實話我真的希望你可以多了解一些耶穌的事情
Seeking just to know Him better, I hope in perfect timing we can
就是能更好的理解他，我希望在一個適合的時間我們可以
See the reason clearer, I hope you're smiling now
把話說得更清楚明了，但現在我希望你可以微笑
I hope I cross your mind, I hope you never second guess
我希望我能進入你的世界，我希望你可以敞開心扉
If what you did was right, cause I'm so proud of you
如果你做的都問心無愧，我為你感到驕傲
I love and admire you, so after all these years this is my way of telling you
我愛你，也很崇拜你，這就是我這些年來走過的路，請讓我對你訴說
Chorus (x2)
副歌X2
I wonder if theres a smile on your face
我不知道你的臉上是否常掛微笑
Sometimes I miss you and long for your embrace
有時候，我很想念你，也渴望得到你的擁抱
I never could thank you, enough for holding on
我從來沒有機會感謝你，我也沒有放棄這種想法
Dear mama mama mama, forever, I'll hold you in my heart
親愛的媽媽啊，在我心裡你永遠沒有離開過我
I wonder if theres a smile on your face
我不知道你的臉上是否常掛微笑
Sometimes I miss you and long for your embrace
有時候，我很想念你，也渴望得到你的擁抱
I never could thank you, enough for holding on
我從來沒有機會感謝你，我也沒有放棄這種想法
Dear mama mama mama, forever, I'll hold you in my heart
親愛的媽媽啊，在我心裡你永遠沒有離開過我