How Could You Leave Us

(This song deals with NF's mother's addiction to popping pills and the neglect he felt throughout his life)
（此歌予NF濫用藥物致死的母親，並傾訴無人關愛的感想）
(He feels that she chose the pills over her own kids and therefore, and that she left him standing in the dust)
（他感到母親寧願選擇毒品也不顧孩子，甚至任他自生自滅）

你怎能突然扔下我們不管？
How could you leave us so unexpected?
我們等著，等著你回岸
We were waiting, we were waiting
對你等待卻是枉然
For you but you just left us
我們需要...我需要你
We needed you, I needed you
我不知道嗑藥到底會有什麼感受

但我清楚目睹至親死去有多難受
Yo, I don't know what it's like to be addicted to pills
媽媽說她有多愛我，我真的覺得很荒謬
But I do know what it's like to be a witness it kills
聞到煙臭時，你的身影才在我腦海停留
Mama told me she love me, I'm thinking this isn't real
歡迎來到痛苦深窖
I think of you when I get a whiff of that cigarette smell, yeah
人們說痛楚如囚，我只想逃離這苦牢
Welcome to the bottom of hell
你說以我為榮，可你對我根本從不知曉
They say pain is a prison, let me out of my cell
坐在房裡，淚不成聲的我卻無助地吼叫
You say you proud of me, but you don't know me that well
前一秒還在我耳邊說好放學要為我接送
Sit in my room, tears running down my face and I yell
下一秒你卻反悔，留我在校門口無地自容
Into my pillowcases, you say you coming to get us
我在房間裡對著素不相識的父母感到無所適從
Then call 'em a minute later just to tell us you not, I'm humiliated
調查的女士作起筆記望著我們蜷縮在角落裡只覺無關癢痛
I'm in a room with a parent that I don't barely know
我真不明白，媽媽你真不想看著孩子長大？
Some lady in the corner watching us, while she taking notes
哪怕放不下這些藥丸，只要你肯拒絕就足夠
I don't get it mom, don't you want to watch your babies grow?
可你根本不會這樣做，不到死你都不會回頭
I guess that pills are more important,all you have to say is no
明知你去世卻仍覺得你還沒走
But you won't do it will you? You gon' keep popping 'til those pills kill you
你為什麼離開我們？
I know you gone but I can still feel you
為什麼要離開我們？

你怎麼能這樣一走了之？
Why would you leave us?
怎麼能撇下我們不管？
Why would you leave us?
為什麼你要拋棄我們？
How could you leave us here?
How would you leave us?
看著家庭照也能將我折磨到底
Why would you leave us?
我並不想照片裡的母親，我要真實的你
Oh, Hey...
如今我們之間的親情已經無法回到從前

為什麼我會覺得心中若有缺陷？
I got this picture in my room and it kills me
我畢業的時候身邊該有你
But I don't need a picture of my mom, I need the real thing
告訴你愛我，然後為我歡慶【NF高中畢業那年母親剛好去世】
Now a relationship is something we won't ever have
而不是留我們在窗前白白等你
Why do I feel like I lost something that I never had?
你在哪，媽？是不是我們年少無知找不到你在哪裡 嗯？
You shoulda been there when I graduated
我很清楚那些毒藥讓你著迷不已
Told me you love me and congratulations
我能看到你眼裡的藥癮，藥性將你佔據
Instead you left us at the window waiting
有人談起嗑藥有多痛快，我卻毫無笑意
Where you at mom? We're too young to understand where you at huh?
估計當時的你根本就意識不到這些事情
Yeah, I know those drugs got you held captive
不知道我只是個懵懂的孩子根本無法理解你
I can see it in your eyes, they got your mind captured
我永遠不會原諒你因為我未想過要責怪你
Some say it's fun to get the high but I am not laughing
心想時過境遷，痛苦也許不值一提
What you don't realise and what you not grasping
你要真的關心我，那你到底去了哪裡？
That I was nothing but a kid who couldn't understand
你為什麼離開我們？
I ain't gon' say that I forgive you cause it hasn't happened
為什麼要離開我們？
I thought that maybe I feel better as time passes
你怎麼能這樣一走了之？
If you really cared for me, then where you at then?
怎麼能撇下我們不管？為什麼要拋棄我們？

Why would you leave us?
上一次對話，你還和我坐房間裡交心
Why would you leave us?
談起我的音樂，就給了幾首小樣讓你聽聽
How could you leave us here?
你卻哭了起來，斥責我這樣下去不行
How could you leave us? Why would you leave us?
要能撐多幾星期，你肯定會改變反對的聲音
Oh, Hey
取而代之你最後還是沾上幾顆藥丸

它們曾經從我們帶走了你，如今卻是一去不復返
Our last conversation, you and I were sat in the living room
我在錄音棚哭紅了眼是有多醜
Talking 'bout my music and I brought you something to listen to
只有音樂能讓我述出對你的悲愁
You started crying, telling me this isn't you
唯有這樣才讓我在你葬禮上忍住淚流
Couple weeks later , guess you were singing a different tune
坐椅子上的我說起話也可憐難受
You took them pills for the last time, didn't you?
多希望你在這裡，可每當想起你
They took you from us once, guess they came back to finish you
我只覺得痛苦，我憎恨思念的痛楚
Crying my eyes out in the studio is difficult
他們發現你倒在地上，我能描述出你的絕望
Music is the only place that I can go to speak to you
給這該死的藥丸付出了生命和所有
It took everything inside of me to not scream at your funeral
你把擁有的一切都倒進了藥丸的瓶口
Sitting in my chair, that person talking was pitiful
不知你有沒聽見我，可你要是看見了能不能回句話媽！
I wish you were here mama but every time I picture you
你為什麼離開我們？
All I feel is pain, I hate the way I remember you
為什麼要離開我們？
They found you on the floor, I could tell that you felt hallow
你怎麼能這樣一走了之？
Gave everything you had plus your life to them pill bottles
怎麼能撇下我們不管？
You gave everything you had plus your life to them pill bottles
為什麼要拋棄我們？
Don't know if you hear me or not, but if you still watching ma

（啜泣）有時我也想過..
Why would you leave us?
有時我會那樣想，你知道嗎
Why would you leave us?
要是我有了自己的孩子，你卻不在那，你懂嗎？
How could you leave us here?
發生什麼事你都不會在那裡
How would you leave us?
反正再也見不到你了
Why would you leave us ?
有時我想當初要是打個電話給你
Oh, Hey...
想著要是拿起電話，你在另一頭就好了

你本該在這裡照顧好我們
(Sobbing) Sometimes I think about like
你本來留在這裡的，是該死的藥把你帶走了，對不？
Sometimes I think about things like, you know
該死的藥把你帶走了，對不？
When I have kids, you won't be there, you know?
我希望你還在這
You won't be there for any of that
I'll never get to see you again
Sometimes I wish I would have just called you
I wish I would have just picked up the phone, wish you were here
I mean you should of been there for us
You should have been here, those pills got you, right?
Them pills got you, right?
I wish you were here